It was just a dream, Tyelpe
by QueenoftheWolves83
Summary: "It was just a dream," are the words Maeglin tells him. Always tells him after a night terror. Dreams they may be, but Celebrimbor doesn't want them, yet neither does he want to share them with Maeglin, who he fears would not understand.


**Disclaimer:** I don't own _The Silmarillion_ nor any of the characters in the books. I only own the idea that created this drabble.

 ** _My first work for_ The Silmarillion. Actually, it's a drabble. **

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Once again, Celebrimbor awoke with an ear-piercing scream. Mind still in the night terror and close to panicking, he struggled against the hands on his body, thinking they were _his_. He couldn't succumb, not now, not ever. Stay true to morals, to beliefs, to self. _Don't want don't want don't want can't won't never not again..._

"It's okay, Tyelpe! It was just a dream!" came a voice he knew all too, shaking him of his terror. Blinking his eyes, clearing them, he saw Maeglin's concerned face, worried eyes. "He's not here. He's not here and he never will be again. He is but a weakened shadow."

The younger _nér_ 's voice was gentle, his tone soothing. It took all of his willpower to not throw himself into his lover's arms and cry. Celebrimbor was ashamed of that reaction, just as he was ashamed of awaking with a scream nearly every night. He was _not_ a sniveling elfling. He was _stronger_ than this.

The healers would tell him that his reactions were born of the trauma he went through before his death, something to be expected, nothing shameful. Torture had a profound effect on a person, on their mind, and the lies he had been told by _him_ certainly hadn't helped to make it better. Lies he had foolishly believed. Lies that just made it worse. Lies that he hears throughout his night terrors.

"Do you wish to talk about it?" Maeglin asked once he calmed down. "It might help."

Celebrimbor looked away, eyes downcast, ignoring the question. "Did I wake you, Lómion? I am sorry. I'll try not to next time." The only way he could do that would be to sleep in another room. Maybe he should. No need to burden the other. After all, he had wolves of his own to deal with and Celebrimbor knew that his nightmares probably weren't helping that, only hindering.

"Damn it, Tyelpe! Would you please just let me in?" The younger _nér_ said, frustrated. "I want to help you and you're just..." He ran a hand through his dark hair with a noise to convey his frustration. "Why do you have to be so damn _stubborn_?"

"Because this is my burden to deal with," Celebrimbor wants to say but he holds his tongue. It's not that he doesn't _want_ Maeglin to help him, but these nightmares are his to deal with and troubling another with them is the _last_ thing he wants to do. And though it pained him to admit, his ordeal was much different than Maeglin's. It was intimate, more personal, more traumatic and that's what why Maeglin would not understand. Perhaps this is the true reason he holds his tongue. What he says instead is, "They are merely dreams. They'll go away eventually." _Yeah right_.

Maeglin snorted, not believing him. "I find that hard to believe."

Without another word, Celebrimbor got out of bed and left the room, wanting to seek solace, to calm his mind, in another place. One thing for sure is that he wouldn't be sleeping for the rest of the night.

Before he could get far, however, Maeglin's voice stopped him. "You say you trust me and yet you don't trust me enough to help you with your nightmares, which makes me wonder if you even trust me at all, Tyelpe."

Celebrimbor didn't give a response as he turned down the hallway and left.

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 _ **A/N: I probably should have use their Sindarin names when they referred to each other. But I'm a sucker for Quenya names and I think it would be rather intimate for Elven partners to address each other with their Quenya name (if they had one) instead of their Sindarin name when they returned to Valinor. Thus, why I had them refer to each other as such.**_

 _ **Time for explanations. Morgoth threatened to torture Maeglin with unimaginable torment, while Celebrimbor went through torture first-hand and was used as a banner after he died. Both are bad, but the second one kind of ruined Celebrimbor's life. Also, I kind of ship Sauron | Annatar and Celebrimbor so that's what I mean by the "it's intimate, more personal" since what he went through happened at the hands of someone he cared deeply about. Plus, strong the House of Fëanor might be, that doesn't mean even they are immune to trauma and night terrors...**_

 _ **Maeglin's wolves just deal with his betrayal of Gondolin and his guilt over it because I don't doubt he'd feel guilty over it.**_

 _ **Wow. That was rather long. Okay. Time to draw this to a close...**_

 _ **Please review so that I know what you thought of this little drabble and where I could improve in my writing.**_


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